slid my 3000 dollar crocs off

It's baseball season now, and the sky doesn't get dark until later.  Melancholy season, birthday parties, heat storms, boardwalks.  Dangly earrings.
I get tired of people fast on days like today, so I just pretend things are going the way I want and wait for mealtimes.  
I feel phony whenever I try for something, try to improve myself.  I get a real laugh from my past self, all the times I thought I could change.
I had lunch with my science teacher yesterday.  He assigned me extra reading (one of those teachers that think their subject is what you're interested in, what you would want to spend your free time thinking about) and gave me cold water from his mini fridge.  I actually really like him, but his tan Freddie Mac jacket laying on the table in front of me was distracting.


  1. i feel kinda phony when i try to improve myself too. sometimes i wonder if its because of this, like subconciously or something, that i'm stubborn about change.

  2. I saw your comment on the Francis Collins book on Hail Mary's blog. I've read reviews of this book, but never read it. I have read an interesting book by Kenneth Miller, a biology professor at Brown University, which refutes the claims of creationism while respecting religion and belief in God. You might be interested in reading it.


  3. Thanks! the book does look interesting, especially the bit about intelligent design being potentially harmful to the development/life of America's "scientific soul". I go to a very Christian school, but I am thankful that my science teacher doesn't only present one explanation to his students.

  4. It annoys me too when teachers think that your life equals the subject they're teaching. I'm completely ready for hte long days that are coming though.

  5. oh, how quickly I seem to get tired of people as well..

  6. I am such a huge fan of your writing. I am so sick of these prosaic blogs that have nothing important to say. no message. no soul.We should exchange links. If you post mine i'll post yours!

  7. I know what you mean, sometimes I feel phony writing a blog, instead of it being a way to track my ideas and inspirations it makes me feel pretentious.
    I love saving up your posts and going back to read them, it's hard to believe how much insight you have at 13 years old... back then... I don't want to remember back then.

  8. Oh, and Angela's Ashes is one of my favourite books, I thought about it forever after reading it. I want to read Frank McCourt's other book 'tis next.

  9. me too! although I think Frank McCourt became an alcoholic for a long time, so 'tis might be hard to get through, reading misfortune after misfortune.